People are doing some really, really cool shit on Vine. But you know what the one thing to remember about that is? It’s a smartphone app.
I’ll admit that I love consuming and creating things for Vine and that even though I did it, I felt a bit out of control that one time David prompted a few of us to help him get the #iSpider tag trending and I spent a real life $2 on a couple bags of plastic spiders and then a pointless amount of time hot gluing them to an old phone for the sake of making a 6-second joke. So I’m here to admit to you first that I’m just as guilty of “dying to make Vine a thing” as I am at “getting the phrase ‘tits’ to happen”.
I decided to see just how desperate users or non-users were to be involved in such a content platform’s uprising. So naturally I posted an ad on Craigslist calling for a “Full-Time Vine Shooter”. Because I’m an “asshole taking advantage of the unemployed.” A piece of feedback, as a joke-teller by trade, that brought me to tears of flattered joy. So thank you, guy who just made all of this worth every penny. Thank you so much.
Within minutes, I had over 25 replies in my firstname.lastname@example.org inbox. TWENTY-FIVE PROSPECTS IN MERE MINUTES, YOU GUYS! I left the post live for 15-days and received a total of 287 replies vying for the position. Now I’d like to take a minute to showcase to you the types of people who were responding to this ad:
The Unemployed Guy
The Unsure Interested Guy
The Convinced-It’s-Real Guy
The Bravo Gal
Quite obviously, Sally is my favorite person (and already confirmed from a little back and forth on the email that she’s a new fan around these parts…::waves enthusiastically::). And, while I got myself a good laugh reading the replies and unexpectedly finding some new accounts to follow on Vine, it just goes to show that these apps are making people absolutely nutshit.
Please stop taking smartphone apps so seriously. Yes, I also mean Candy Crush.